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Wednesday, August 31, 2005'♥

Im Happy today.. initially not..after a series of event.. im back to my normal self again le.hehe

Was waiting for the bus in the morning..when one auntie approached me..and keep asking mi to buy tissue for her.. initially i said dun wan de.. but in the end i see her like veri ke lian..so i bought from her.. so now i got supplies of tissue le..

A busy day..coz its end of the month..so many account closing...so many forms to stamp..tink i will have muscle if i continued stamping the high volume of forms for a month..hehehe..Chitra is troubled over the cheque matter the whole day.. haiz.. poor ger.. reulted we did OT coz today was super busy.. nv went for my running oso..hmph...

Sandy called mi...and told mi tat my fox pay slip is here.. i was so surprised coz i tot i took all my pay liao.. and its hundred plus..wooo so shiok haha.. finally got some money le.. went down to pick up my cheque from Bestina.. the whole place was like a grabage center.. bought a visor its onli 4.50 wow..so cute man.. today last day of sales le..


Happy dat Choo lie finally got the job at DBS.. its going to be a place full of ITE Bishan and EVSS students hahah.. heard from her tat i intro her in will get some rewards?? ahha i didnt know tat too .. i helped her out of goodwill.. now trying to recommend Shu fen for this job too..hopefully they still need ppl ba...

Syahida returned mi the money she owed mi.. one dollar?? when i most needed money now..haha the same amt i spent on the tissue.. wad goes ard comes ard.. looking forward for the siru's chalet on friday.. going to see my beloved bao bei soon.. and we will be discussing abt our GENTING TRIP...yesh after so long we are realli going le..will be going after her exams.. tink two weeks time ba..Ngee Ann normally slower de hahaha.. yeah..

Decided to get a anklet or pendant for my god daughter Charlotte.. i meant it hor she's realli my god daughter hehe..so tat next time when im single got a yi kao..bullshit lor..hahahhaha she is everyone's god daughter.. hopefully shao mei will be going wit mi ba..

This weekend will be veri busy ba.. mummy going thailand tmr..haiz.. enjoy ba.. ive oredi write down my wishlist for her le..hehe.. so lonely without mummy..hopefully daddy and mi will not quarrel.. sianz ah next week whole week in tamp...arggggghhh the graveyard.. coz of the IRAS submission.. will be super busy too..the onli comforting things is tat im getting my pay next week.. wooo hooooooooooo... i can onli choose to rebond my hair or buy the guess watch.. which one shld i choose???

Cant get enough of u at the moment....

With Love, 10:15 PM



'♥

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.

In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.
You would be forced to break up with someone who was arrogant, acting like the dictator of your life.

Your ideal relationship is comforting. You crave a relationship where you always feel warmth and love.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage.

In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.



TOTALLY AGREED!!!... got this site from a forum..

With Love, 7:24 AM



Monday, August 29, 2005'♥

Im Happy today..i oso dunno y.. im just happy.. *grins*


Mummy going to thailand for holiday on 1 sep..of coz im not happy wit that...

Going to mit my beloved cousin Mi jie tmr...

Miting Jerry on wed to go running..yoohoo...

Thur staying at home to support weilian..the PROJECT SUPERSTAR...

FRI cg.. wooohooo

Sat serving in gloria jeans...

Sun my beloved god daughter BaBy Charlotte full month celebration..

Yeah im totally booked this week..woohooo..im still veri happy...

With Love, 7:01 PM



Sunday, August 28, 2005'♥

Wad a day of rotting at home.. was actually going out wit Kelvin today..turned out tat he had a bad flu.. so i asked him to stay at home to rest the whole day.. asked him to call mi every five hours so tat to make sure he is realli at home resting.. coz he always like to go out wit his zhu peng gou you..lol.. hmm tink tat everytime we wanted to go out sure got things happen de..if its not mi then its him..hahaha wad a joke..

So abt my rotting.. basically i was at home...listening to songs.. log into irc..so tat ah jin can send mi songs faster..wowo one yr liao nv log in lei..haha...knew some ppl in there.. but i tink the ppl tere not veri trustable ba..lolz anyway i dun care...played gunbound wit BEN..yes its BEN tupperware's brother.. haha played for almost two hours wit him.. read my harry potter...and before i knew it...its 7pm..watched the show..pao ba hai zi...so sad and oso the korean show hui jia.. i cried when i saw the ah ma..its like my ah ma..and i missed her so much..

Stupid msn..when i talked to ppl there write the msg cannot be sent to the receipent..walao..y like dat..i was so pek chek lor..and guess wad..my contact list is back to zero again..argggghhh y is it always be???? so i have to go ard adding ppl again.. sianz..i hate msn..

Half an hour more to fight the monday blues monster...sianz..the tot of going to wrk irks mi.. how i wish weekends can be longer.. will try my best to take off on thur.. to go back bishan.. i wan to take medicine oso.. srry ah selyn.. if i realli cant take off.. u knw my situation rite.. wanted to go gym but no ppl pei mi..so sad, my usual khaki says she's busy this week..sianz have to wait one more week.. tupperware and frying pan if interested tell mi i got free pass...so tmr might be going home ba after work.. waiting for pay day to come......

If one day the day come.. and we have to part.. will u still care abt mi??

With Love, 11:26 PM



'♥

I have deleted the blog of mi and him.. after much consideration.. no pt keeping it...it will onli leave mi feeling worse...

Jerry told mi tat i potrayed the image of being veri busy..everytime talked to mi i like rushing to put down the phone..in msn oso..always not there.. is it?? i oso dunno lei..i nv realised it.. then Ryan told mi just now in msn the same thing.. diaoz... no la im not busy.. maybe im away watching tv all these.. and sometimes is i realli not in a good mood.. so i dun feel like chatting...as for the phone thing.. maybe im outside ba.. so veri noisy..cant hear...hahaha happy wit the explanation mr jerry??

Mum is nagging and nagging now.. so pek chek.. tink i have to get out of the house soon.. miting kelvin and we are going to the beach...yeah..so long nv go liao.... need to relax.. but i missed Sentosa more.. so long nv go there and have fun le.. working life simply sux... hao le hao le.. gtg early..if not monday blues monster will be here liao..

i missed mi jie.. i missed balaclavia... i missed lao chek.. i missed tupperware...i missed yong shun... i missed sec sch days... i missed batam..i missed ling...

With Love, 11:51 AM



'♥

Just got home not long ago...

Was in church the whole day.. tot of going Liquid Room wit Baobei they all..but feel veri sian..Got to know a few new frens today.. Mavin and Ting ray.. they realli make mi laugh like mad woman..we ordered ROJAK from the coffeeshop..and its so stupid..rojak wit no tau pok and not to mention my FAV YOU TIAO..wad???? onli cucumber and turnip..and some pathetic pineapple.. diaoz.. no more you tiao nv say de lei..sian lor i was behaving like a mad woman in church the whole day today.. oso dunno y...my mood was good..

I finally bought a black shrug le..hehe wanna tk the seller she even helped mi alter the sleeves..so nice of her..Karen gave mi the bag tat she bought in Hk.. wow its a totally gold bag..haha breakthrough lei..and i love it alot.. so punk man..lolz...and oso a tin of cookies from HK DISNEYLAND...hahahha so cute u know..

Was at the riveria chatting and fellowshipping wit my members.. where i got a full view of his house...tink he's at home ba..i was msging JERRY tat i so heng.. dunno y la suddenly msged the wrong person..and guessed wad it went to him.. diaoz...its so bloody throw face.. i didnt even realise it.. until he msged mi.. well srry to disturb him...anyway he didnt even care abt it rite??

After church.. Jerry sent mi home.. continue to crap the way home as we walked back.. then reached liao still buy drinks from 7-11 and continue chatting.. haha its like so long we nv chatted liao.. the weather is so windy today.. a good day for chatting..

Looking for ppl to be volunteer to sell the TULIPS FOR THE CHILDREN CANCER FOUNDATION...who want to go wit mi?? its on 4 SEP got two shift 9-1 or 1-6... for mi i will choose the second one ba.. SELYN go lei.. Frying pan and TUPPERWARE GO LEI.. lets go and do a part for charity ba..

I finally smiled and its not becoz of u this time round....

With Love, 1:37 AM



Saturday, August 27, 2005'♥

Super tiring day.. missed the bus today..resulted in being late for work.. nvm more to come my way.. just reached chai chee awhile..then tat gong gong supervisor of tamp asked mi to go back tamp today after lunch.. i was like..wtf?? becoz tat "woman" took MC..damn it. lor..waste my transportation fee.. somemore i dun have lunch break lor. onli half an hour..si ji dan.. y im so suay de everytime..

Jo called mi and asked mi to mit him at tamp for lunch..since i got tat pathetic half an hour..so i met him and harry potter..when i saw them JO was outside smoking.. then i talked to harry potter.. and he told mi tat Jo's gf GIGI broke up wit him?? i was eating half way then i choked// duhz.. y like dat"?? they just celebrated their first month together.. is relationship nowadays so fragile?? im feeling so sad for him haiz...wad is love???

Then jo came in and told mi the whole story lor.. so now singlehood club got one more member le.. We welcome anyone of any religion, age and size..as long ur single.. pls email to kerin155@hotmail.com to register..lol..

Went cg...and im so happy tat Karen bought mi a bag from hk.. tmr then she will pass mi..tks tks im so SUPER TOUCHED.. shared my offering msg in cg.. i did not refer to the bible wor.. you tu po liao..hahha.. cg msg was good.. abt 4 kinds of test we faced in our life..

* Pressure test - are u living under stress??
* People test - do u feel disappointed becoz of someone??
* Persistent test - Are u committed??
* Priority test - the most impt de.. wad is most impt in ur life rite now??

I tink i failed all the test.. im living under stress yet i did not turned to God..instead going to frens.. HE is the pillar of strength..Why do i Miss HIM OUT?? As for the people test.. yes im realli veri disappointed in "him"... someone whom i trust and love so much becoz of some lame reason broke up wit mi?? i still cant figure out how and y do u change to be anotehr person in such a short time/// tell mi if u were mi how will u react?? happy?? As for the persistent test, i admit im not committed enough in church... lastly PRIORITY.. feeling the most guilty..realise my first priority is not GOD>..its money, shoppping, food..anything but Him.. haiz.. need to seriously change myself.. i cant be like these forever..

im such a failure.. there are times at nite.. i felt like msging u.. felt like calling u.. yesh if ur reading this post.. u might be giving a little smirk.. feeling so great tat im actually here suffering for u...i tot i have oredi given up on u.. but i cant.. even the slightest thing reminds mi of u.. this is so miserable.. if given mi a chance..i wld have not chose to know u at all..maybe i wont be feeling so terrible rite now.... i dunno wads my feeling for u ?? hate or love?..

I hate those ppl who are veri happily in love asking mi.."eh u broke up wit u bf liao ah?" "Huh y like dat??"" its bloody sacarstic to mi ppl..if u do not know.. from now on those who are so happily in love..pls i mean pls..dun come and asked mi abt my relationship..yesh i might sound abit mad..i just had enough of ppl asking mi these qns..

With Love, 12:20 AM



Thursday, August 25, 2005'♥

Wad a tiring day...and oso not so lucky day...

Went to work at tam branch... sianz..atmosphere totally different lor..haiz..how am i going to survive the whole day..luckily tat "woman" worked half day.... then after lunch my stomach was so painful tat i cant concentrate on my work at all..so in the end i took half day off.. sianz..

Went home and took a nap before going out to mit FRYING PAN..both of us super sian and tired..dinner was at V8..long time nv go le... order my fav chk cutlet...and frying pan order chk chop..saw a veri disgusting mum.. she put the food in her mouth then spit out and let her daughter eat.. MIND U this is the TRUTH..omg..we almost fainted at the sight of it..so gross..and the gong gong daughter..dunno how to fight de...eeeeeeekkk almost vomitted out our dinner..

Went to shop ard at BUGIS VILLAGE...realli changed alot wit more shops.. im broke..so its our shopping queen preying for somthing to buy..walk until half way she told mi she want to go LS?? OMG just now asked her go toilet she go there make up...then now.. walked until so shuang liao she wan to LS?? hahah so we walked all the way to OG toilet.. wanted to go to the watch shop and look for my GUESS watch but it was closed liao..sian sian sian..

Bought a beaded necklace from there.. still owe FRYING PAN MONEY LEI..haha tink im too old liao..for those of u who know mi i seldom buy acessories de lor.. this time is a tu po liao hor.. love it alot man..going to wear it to work tmr wor..

Tmr will be working at CHAI CHEE woo hooo..can see all my frens liao...after tat going to cg at TIONG BARHU..Chelsia promised mi a nice dinner de wor.. sat will be serving GLORIA JEANS ba..sian lei.. so long nv serve liao..somemore this week not my team..wit all those little kids..duhz..see how ba..

Saw Fab onilne..faster go nudge him..haiz who knows its not him its his sister..diaos.. talked to her for awhile..she say their home at MALAYSIA no comp..so how am i going to talk to him neh...hahahaha..wait and wait ba..wonder have he found a job there liao.. oei si lao chek..if u see this blog..gif mi a call hor...

Everywhere i go is the song TONG HUA>>>JIA GEI WO>>>WAN BU LIAO>>>y like dat.. want to forget a person realli is so difficult lei...but im forced to do so...

ITS SO EASY TO FALL IN LOVE>>>>BUT ITS SO DIFFICULT TO GET OUT OF IT>>>

With Love, 11:33 PM



Wednesday, August 24, 2005'♥

A busy day for mi.. There are so much things for mi to clear today.. tat i kept walking ard the office.. good good walk more can slim down..haha i saw "him" in the office..and i was shocked.. he oso transferred here today ah?? lolz.. but too bad he didnt saw mi...when im at Chai Chee im so happy.. and from now on every tue and wed i will be back there.. haha like my second home lor.. we even shared money to buy TOTO .. our destination is to go DISNEY LAND wor..hahaha...going back to tam tmr liao sianz...

After work nv go anywhere..so i just went home.. no money and im oso veri tired lor.. Kelvin called mi out but i dun wan... and he sounded so disappointed..

Tmr will be miting the FRYING PAN for dinner at BUGIS.. tink we wld be going to the CAN CAFE ba.. will update u guys on the trip ba.. life is so stressful tat we need to take time out and relax...

While i am working today.. i kept tinking of a matter.. y do humans change their emotions and feelings so fast?? im still tinking.....

With Love, 10:23 PM



Tuesday, August 23, 2005'♥

Had a long chat wit Fab my lao chek yst nite.. thru skype.. oso the place where i knew him initially... time passes veri fast and he yst nite then tell mi he's going back Malaysia today haiz.. he is still him..always trying to make mi happy.. and he promise to go KL wit mi de.. haha hope he keep his words.. hope he will come back to SINGAPORE on SEP ba..hehe i will surely missed him de..

Work in Chai chee today,..hiaz i ver kelian de.. everytime have to work different places thur then go back TAMP de branch..coz here no staff ma..Chitra is back from NEW ZEALAND.. and can see tat she enjoyed her time wit her husband there.. we missed her so much man.. seems tat everyone is going on a holiday..haiz..

Waited for SElyn and we took the company bus to BEdok..was so shocked tat the bus actually go to City Hall too man.. so tmr next time when i wrk in chai chee i can take the bus to town for free lei.. We went to shop at NTUC can u imagine how long we spent there?? Bought Jap Curry decided to cook and bring it for lunch on thur and oso Selyn bought the miso soup hope its nice wor.. bought little things here and there and its oredi ten bucks le.. haha so power lei.. then we went to eat dim sum at one of stall there..nt bad but not as good as the hotel de..hehe

Going to take a day off on SEp 1 ba.. wanted to go back bishan to visit teachers.. and selyn wanted to take the cert.. oso i can visit the doctor too.. finally we both can go out le..shall enjoy ourselves ba..hopefully our off can be approved..lolz..

Sometimes the things are rite in front of u and u didnt even realise it until its not there anymore.. We always tend to overlook things and take it for granted...but when its not there anymore..u tend to missed it ...

With Love, 10:04 PM



Monday, August 22, 2005'♥

Called mi the Diahrroea Queen... my stomach is having blues rite now..haiz.. these few days always got diarrhoea oso dunno y.. tink its tat selyn hai wo de..haha we been sharing medicine..too poor to see doc..lolz.. hmm so pek chek lor.. dunno wad happen to my stomach..once i ate liao..then it will come out..maybe its oso a good way of losing weight ba..but nt a good way for selyn haha coz she so slim le..

My mood was good today..i oso dunno wad..nothing much happen.. im so busy tat i did not realise its lunch time until siti told mi tat...met shao mei for lunch..we went S11...then went GIODARNO and saw the T_SHIRT 3 for 11 dollars!!! haha so i bought one round neck in white.. shared wit her and her colleagues.. now they got this DISNEY character de..all so cute..but im waiting for my piglet de to come..hehe winnie the pooh although cute..but NO WAY!!! dun remind mi of him pls.. loved the plastic bag so much..its so cute...

Went home str away monday ma..a day to rest hehe.. changed my blogskins..nicer rite.. i like the wordings..veri true.. gonna upload songs into my MP3.. Zhong jin msned mi and told mi a shocking secret.. he broke up wit his gf of 2 yrs?? omg.. diaoz.. wad is happening nowadays man.. might be miting him later at my hse downstairs to drink kopi.. see how ba..if poh ken wanna come oso.. missed ah jin so much.. knew him since sec sch.. we everyday talked to each other de hor.. we are like close bro and sis.. and he is veri caring de.. we can talked until last time his sis tot im his gf lor..hahahha.. but its impossible within us de.. coz we are in a platonic relationship lol..

Alot of ppl said tat my pic wit AHMAD.. AHMAD looks like STEVEN LIM?? omg.. its so impoosible..hahaha they realli makes mi laugh until pengs lei.. anyway Ahmad is my cousin ah boi's best fren..he is a chn wor.. ah mi like to bully him..always forced him to drink alot hahha.. .

Tmr going to work in chai chee.. hmm heard tat CHITRA is back from her holidays in NEW ZEALAND le..hehe yeah so tmr is going to be a slack day..i oso dunno y GEOK POH asked mi back there.. thur going out wit xiao han..we are going to BUGIS can cafe...hehe nice ambience there...

Ya im going to lock my blog again.. instead of changing the address coz im grown attached to this add le.. for one yr plus ive been blogging here.. so as for the password asked mi in msn ba... reason is simple.. ask mi then i tell u ba..lol.. so in three days time.. im going to locked le..

With Love, 9:30 PM



Sunday, August 21, 2005'♥

Got the worst HANGOVER in my whole life.. first time im so drunk tat i promise not to drink CHIVAS REGAL anymore..the tot of it makes mi puke.. stomach is growling.. head is spinning and worst i felt like vomiting...mi and mi jie felt the same and she more worst she vomitted two times liao.. we woke up at 8am and cant slp anymore coz its realli veri pathetic.. ate the hangover medicine and meantime while waiting for the medicine to kick off we chatted.. haha

We were seperated by a Queen Sized bed..so whenever we talked we must say OVER OVER!!!! haha kept talking to each other so tat none of us sleep..from now on..CHIVAS is called " YOU KNOW WAD" and we cant say the word BROWN AND DRINK.. haha its so funni... becoz the tot of all these makes us feel like puking.. its onli at 12 then we both felt asleep..how miserable we are..lolz..

Enjoyed myself to the fullest during this trip esp the KTV part.. we were all so high.. wanna say happy birthday to AH MI lol... tks for the treat...and the 3 bottles of U KNOW WAD...total think she spent ard 200plus ba.. reached home i didnt even change and i just fell asleep..woke up and i got shocked...argggghhhh...

total there are ard 20 of us most of them are guys.. mostly ah boi frens.. ah boi is my cousin same age as mi..lolz..there is this ger called LING.. we met for the first time and we talked the whole nite man.. mainly coz her situation same as mi.. Ex gave the same reason for breaking up.. hur hur.. and we realise guys always dun care abt hurting a gers feeling.. so sad rite.. so we chatted and chatted i tink in the end we are veri drunk le.. and talked nonsense.. duhz.. Ah mi and AH boi..together wit everyone sang FEN SHOU KUAI LE...for mi.. ahhhh so touched.. and resulted the whole BATAM know tat i shi lian le..hahah

anyway i kan kai le... all the bad memories have been forgotten le.. this is a brand new turning pt of my life.. and i wont messed it up again.. i will surely missed everyone in BATAM.. esp AH BOI>>AH LING>>AHMAD>>hehe..

ORITE i shall let the photos do the talking..too much things to blog le.. starting from my graduation pictures...


ZHU AND MI


MRS HENG AND MI'


AH DA AND MI


FINALLY GRADUATED LIAO


TOGETHER AT ISLAND KTV


ALL TOGETHER


AH BOI AND U KNOW WAD


AH BIN AND KENNI


AH MI and AH BIN


AHMAD AND MI (TAKEN WHEN SUPER DRUNK)


MIRROR IMAGE (HEHE AH SAN's TWINS)


DA SAO AND TWINS..THREE BABIES IF U LK CAREFULLY(SHE's PREGANANT)


woo hoo long entry rite.. k la gt to go slp liao.. tmr got work haiz MONDAY BLUES LE>>> going to missed them alot.. hope i can go back next month.. Da sao and Da jie.. jia you on ur preganancy must take care wor.. and KENNI SILL OWED MI A GLASS OF ORGANGE JUICE...AND TAT AH BOI TOO.. mY BUBU JARKARTA dun tink we are drunk nv hear properly lor..

With Love, 9:38 PM



Saturday, August 20, 2005'♥

Yoo hoo..im now in Batam wor..first time can use com here wor..coz they bought a new com and its using dial up now..super slow lor..well reached here ard 10.30pm..put our bags then we're off for dinner wor...

Went to the roadside hawker..haha first time dine there at ikan lele.. quite dirty but the food was delicious wor.. been having diarrohea since yst.. but i dun care le..like the sotong there so much..then i got this craving of eating porridge so we went to bur bur jarkarta and tapao home..bought a bottle of red wine too..romantic rite..

Feeling so carefree and happy here...kenny who keep pestering us to take photos for him....is so irritating..haha then we helped him to take pictures coz he want to put photos in his friendster..guess wad he actually go and change and style his hair at the 2.50am...diaoz..and we are forced to be his photographer man.. haha

Tmr is going to be a long day..going to pay respect to my grandad and then off we go to celebrate my cousin ah mi birthday.. haha going to the ktv..hope we will all enjoy ourselves and most importantly my diarrohea is gone..tks fang fang for the medincine..if not im going to collaspe le..

Kelvin is going to pick mi up when i came back from Sunday.. wad are frens for man.. he is realli someone great

Btw Tupperware and Frying pan..are u missing mi now?? as well as Dexun?? hahahah lol..k k shall update again soon...

loads of pic to be uploaded soon..buai buai

With Love, 2:30 AM



Thursday, August 18, 2005'♥

I have officially graduated.. As i walked down to the stage.. i knew tat i have grown up.. and tat i must continue to move on...one day i will be at the stage collecting my diploma cert..

Took lots of photos..but needed to borrowed the cardd reader from selyn then can upload.. happy to see all of my frens.. some of them more prettier while some of them look more yaya..saw alot of old schoolmates..btw the reception sux.. the food not alot of variety lor...chatted wit Michelle GOH..and Dr Ricky Tam Prinicpal of ITE CENTRAL COLLEGE..they are veri friendly..and asked abt my job scope now and do i inted to furthere studies..i tink they will be there on the COM ceremony ba.. ya one more to go..its on OCT hopefully im able to apply off again..

After the ceremony i did not went out wit RAS they all.. decided to went home and rest awhile.. then packed my clothes for fri trip.. i need to have a break le...too tired everyday...

If you care..you will bother...

With Love, 5:52 PM



Wednesday, August 17, 2005'♥

Before i started blogging.. bear wit mi ba..this is gonna be a long long entry haha..got a lot of photos wor.. k ba..lets start the story now ba..

TUPPERWARE's BD on 16/8/05

Came up wit a plan wanted to gif tupperware a surprise.. lied to her tat im not going le..coz need to work OT// but our gong gong FRYING PAN dunno how to act de.. our TUPPERWARE was not disappointed at all..although i know deep in her heart if its true she sure cry de rite..hehe

We had our dinner at the Suntec buffet..as usual..wooo so many things to eat..during the course of dinner..something veri funni happened..

FIRST INCIDENT: THE EGG MURDERER

I wanted to eat the eggs.. so i asked our dear FRYING PAN to crack the egg into my soup..i wanted it whole..not beaten..so i tell her i wan yi zheng li de.. guess wad.. the gong gong ger.. suddenly dump the whole egg into my laksa soup?? I was shocked at tat moment.. EYES OPENED WIDE.. WAD?? how can she throw the whole egg in.. i mean its no sense at all rite..im not eating HARDBOILED EGG in LAKSA SOUP?? i tink everyone had a shocked and we were laughing like mad.. the waiter is staring at us..omg..

feel like strangling her at tat moment man..hahaha



INCIDENT NO 2: I was too excited keep taking food to TUPPERWARE.. resulted in her water is full wit bee hoon...laksa gravy.. all those stupid stuff.. for TWO TIMES she changes her water..so in the end.. she cannot tahan anymore she used the pot cover of the steamboat pot and cover her drink..like those ah pek drink tea like dat.. haha it was so funni if u saw her drinking from there.. and realli even she cover her drink in the end the pot cover is full of gravy too..lucky she cover it early..hehe

We ate until veri full in the end guess who is the SOLE SURVIVOR..keep saying aiyoh heng bao lei..but her chopsticks nv fails to move..as well as her mouth..and the sole survivor is....


NONE OTHER THAN...



Applause man.. she is super yao gui.. too bad nv brought her TUPPERWARE ALONG mAN>>if not super throw face...

Some of the pics we took:




si lesbian haha...trying to kiss mi no way?? not reserved for U TWO haha




Premium members of SINGLEHOOD CLUB



haha realli did enjoy ourselves yst.. the next time we hoped to save up money and booked a hotel at town and stayed in for a nite..woo tat will be fun..nv knew single can be so fun too..hehe

Tmr wil be taking half day off from my work.. coz going for the graduation ceremony.. at first dun feel like going de..but ras they all keep msging mi..so i decided to go ba.. missed them too much.. but abit sad lor..no family going wit mi.. haha..

Oh ya..Fab is going back Malaysia.. haiz.. he cant find a job here.. poor him.. hope he can find one soon.. becoz i will sure missed my lao chek de..if he go back le.. no one cheers mi up anymore le..hur hur

My wrk.. now is getting better le.. know more ppl there.. and some are friendly even though their face so aarogant.. working realli adds on alot of experience for mi.. able to learn new things...but one thing will nv change..PPL ALWAYS REMEMBER THE BAD AND NOT THE GOOD...well tats life ba..

Going back to BATAM ON FRIDAY NITE>. i know u all sure missed mi de rite?? well its kinda of release for mi ba..the past month happened too mauch things le.. at a certain pt of time i tot i cant take it liao.. thank GOD FOR FRENS>FAMILY>and God too.. these ppl nv fails to stand by my side.. What is LOVE if u bears to see the loved ones of URS sad and hurt.. dun talked abt everlasting, long lasting relationship if u fails to understand this simple pt.. indeed ive moved on..and im proud of myself.. rite now..i just wanna enjoy my life to the fullest.. as for relationship wise... i wanted to take a break.. ONCE BITTEN TWICE SHY...

OH ya lastly wanna thank SELYN coming all the way to my hse downstairs and passed mi her camera..will be using it for tmr and my BATAM HOLIDAYS.. tks ger even though u worked OT yet u still came.. so long nv see u liao..haiz we better go out ba..if not we realli soon will be veri distant liao..missed ya alot..and my bubu weisi veri cute rite..hehe

With Love, 7:00 PM



Tuesday, August 16, 2005'♥

Hmm shall continue to blog abt the adventure of today tmr...simply too tired le.. hehe.. i love my cousins.. no one shalll take them away from mi...gonna change my blog address soon..so stay tunned to it...

With Love, 11:13 PM



Monday, August 15, 2005'♥

First part of the day did not went veri well..felt like crying in the office man.. i made some silly mistakes.. which i shouldnt coz im working in a bank..and bank is veri particular abt minor mistakes.. duhz.. luckily Cheryl helped mi wit it.. she asked mi to stay calmed.. and when Suihaila came back from lunch i tot she would scold mi...but lucky she did not..instead she helped mi.. thank GOD for tat.. maybe coz yst i did not slept well ba.. keep waking up in the middle of the nite.. i oso dunno y..too stress??? coz i know today monday sure veri busy de..

I promise to be more careful le..and to slp early now...

The horoscope in friendster is veri accurate..it depicts wads happening in my life everyday...what it says for today:

Ah, responsibilities. We all have to deal with them. This just happens to be your day. Pay close attention to the details surrounding a project you're working on. Something small may represent the key turning point.



After work Jo came to wait for mi at my workplace.. today he booked out.. so wanna jio mi out.. missed him so much..he realli brightens up my day and he looked so different le.. in fact we both looked so different le.. then Mary and Angela came and tat mad Jo suddenly said he felt like eating sushi..we were all shocked haha..then he go withdraw money..(at first tot he joking)realli hor.. haha..then we went to Sakae Sushi..so long i nv been there liao.. and we ate until 74 buckz lor.. wow can u imagine he treated us all man.. now is his time to bao da mi liao..xiang dang nian..i always bought things for him.. treated him to eat wooohooo.. so glad and he realli did mature abit..i mean abit nia.. tmr is his first yr anniversary wit gigi.. woo so fast man.. and im happy for him..although jo talked nonsense abt wanting to break soon..i sure slapped him if he do tat.. tink he joking onli ba..hahah wadever.. cherish ur loved ones ba before they left u.. hur hur..speak right from my heart lei..

see how differnt we looked last time and now...(argh my face so disgusting)



NOW:...



Yst went to watch BEWITCHED wit my cousin tat gong gong.. haiz.. wanted to watch WEDDING CRASHER and i even hinted to her..send her the link of the synops..but she insisted and guessed wad..we ended up faking our smiles.. stupid show.. wit gong gong audience laughing their hearts out..dun find it funni at all..wasted my 9.50 haiz.. haha but tt fish and co lady say LETS JUST CONTINUE TO WATCH BA..haha so in the end not onll wasted money and my butt hurts too..if onli i got the magic to turn back time haha...

So she treated mi to AJISEN.. ahha so sweet of her ..awww.. tks ah.. and of course going out wit her always makes mi laugh..she kept eating the popocorn..then there was this auntie telling her daughter.."eh dun buy la see so big packet..cannot eat finish de la" while our fish and co lady oredi eating half way through le..its an insult to us man..hahahha laugh until we peng..

Realli wanna say sorry to Kelvin.. srry on ur 21st bd i said those things to u..i didnt acc on ur bd.. i know its all my fault..i know i spoilt ur bd.. but i dun wan u to have any false hope..im not ready..and i wld appreciate u as a veri good fren..

Things are nt the same.. i felt so distant from u... time realli makes a great differnce..........

With Love, 10:10 PM



Sunday, August 14, 2005'♥

Borrowed a book from Yichun..coz i know i will be simply too bored during lunch time and at home.. wanted to kill off my time.. Its UNDOMESTC GODDESS from Sophie Kinsella.. also the author for the book shopaholic queen..

Nice book indeed..once i read it it just cant get off my hands man.. Abt a modern lady who is so stressed up wit work tat she dun have time for anything.. and she dunno even how to switch on an oven haha..then she ended up in a rich family and even becoming a housekeeper.. of coz in btw got intersting happen.. makes mi laugh like hell.. nice book to recommend.. poor yichun she just read until chp 2 and i snatched it from her.. intend to return her after Batam..but i oredi finished it liao.. duhz..

Im so bored at home.. so decided to play gunbound..the last time i logged in was 17/5 how long is it liao..hahaha and they totally changed the format..oh no.. kerin the pro is losing hahah..too long nv play liao..anyway she bukced up my skill another time hehe..

Mi jie chatted wit mi in the msn..and suddenly she jio mi out for movies..tats exactly wad i needed to get out of the house man..Thank GOD for cousins.. they asked u out at the rite time hahah.. wanted to go swimming but she dun wan.. duhz.. so i decided to bring back my swimwear to Batam and swim at the pool which is one of the facilities at her house.. lolz.. going to watch BEWITCHED... yeah.. dunno nice ma..

Saw some clothes online realli ncie.. and yst went JP oso saw some nice clothes.. pay day is still far away.. well anyway i shall not SPEND so much..decided to open up the SAYE account.. a fixed deposit acocunt..u cant take out the money onli after one yr or two yr.. i tink it will realli helped mi save.. if not is open another account and throw away the atm card...haha no matter wad i need to save...coz nov will be a time for vacation.. im getting out of this country no matter wad..hehe.. wit close frens or relatives ba.. so many ppl jio haven decided..dun feel like celebrating my bd anyway..so those who wanted to buy mi a present.. buy mi an air ticket ba..owell im tinking too mcuh le..

Oh ya didnt went out wit Kelvin coz he going back to work today.. OT lei.. like dat can earn 100 bucks more..coz tmr his bd he going to fetch mi from work and celebrate for him..owell wad shld i get for him??? lolz.. i missed baby charlotte.. hope her mummy will celebrate her one month bd..and im going to present the GOD MOTHER"S angpow hahaha..

Monday blues is on the way.. tmr monday liao..going to be a busy day.. we had decided to go SUNTEC for the steamboat buffet.. coz Birthday ger TUPPERWARE wants it..after so long of consideration.. and its going to be a place for memories...owell realise i haven been blogging abt him so much le.. coz come to think of it why shld i be so foolish always here crying making a big fuss..while he is enjoying his life.. or busy wit his stuff over there.. im just another transparent fren in his msn list.. duhz...

Wait for mi by pop corn..im coming..lolz..and i seriously miss my best pal..SELYN.. muacks..not to mention NELSON.. its a package..but one get one free..opppz..llolz..just jking..lol

With Love, 3:53 PM



Saturday, August 13, 2005'♥

Popo went back Batam today le.. wit my uncle.. so sad wor.. no more GOOD food le..haha so dieting starts today le..hehe.. anyway im going back next week so sure can see her de..hehe..

Service was not bad today.. a short sermon.. abt WORSHIP..The songs in the CROSS album was certainly great.. all my fave songs except amazing are inside..after church went to mit wawa.. srry bao bei tat i didnt went clubbin wit u again.. i know i can be a pillot liao..always put u aeroplane..dunno y lei..tink i too long nv go liao..so not quite used to it..

Met wawa at JP de bread talk..but i was late..not my fault its the church bus.. it went rite inside to NTU.. tink they got some bible study over there at one of the lecture hall.. wowo first time went NTU..the bus took ard 8 mins to turn ard the whole NTU.. its certainly veri BIG..saw Jinchun's hostel..not bad not bad. hehe.. but of coz he was not in la.. i tink its nicer than NUS ba...lolz... so tats y im late lor..hehe.. cant tot of anything for dinner.. so we went to SEOUL garden for dinner..coz of tat gong gong coupon she got there.. guess wad..CANT PAY BY NETS??? wad the F**K..y like dat one..now tell mi which place dun accept nets?? almost everywhere do lor..hahhha..well poor wawa she got to go and draw money.. imagine she not coming back..then im going to be a dishcleaner le..haha

Thank God she came back..lolz.. then we ate our dinner there.. lolz..from now on she is called FRYING PAN..while Cindy still remained as TUPPERWARE..interesting nickname we got therre.. and im free of this kind of nonsense hahaha.. anyway didnt ate much.. onli a few hotdogs (im lying).. haha while that ger ate alot of yellow mee.. i tink she went there just to eat mee..like nv eat before.. MAD WOMAN..still wan to snatch wit mi somemore..hahhaha.. like JP's seoul garden..coz of the potato salad veri nice wor..and not to mention the cheese hotdog..

Then we went shop shop ard.. haha we wanted to go to the library de..but we are 10 mins late..so sad..upon entering a lift..we saw a wierd guy hahah..his expression is so funny..trying to act as if nothing happen.. he pulled his underwear tink it got stuck or itchy ba.. haha i didnt saw it..that perverted FRYING PAN saw it..hahha.. so funni..then went to Harvey Norman coz my headphone is spoilt decided to get one.. so tat My MP3 will not have dust on it..lolz.. compare and compare and guess wad in the end we manage to find one tat is the cheapest 9.90..so kiam rite..hahah then alot of stupid things happen tat makes us laugh like hell..its like we saw the same thing happen and happen again..wonder did we went back to the past..

Wanted to mi jie house to stay over nite..but too bad its too late when she msged mi i oredit went out of the house le.. so nv bring any clothes.. anyway going to celebrate TUPPERWARE bd on tues..wad shall we get for her??

With Love, 11:51 PM



'♥

Today is a fine day.. i didnt missed him tat much..guess im slowly recovering le ba.. tmr got another obstacle..going church tmr means i will passed by his house..haiz...hope i can conquer it ba..

Karen went hongkong le.. just msged her and she is shopping there how i wish im there too haiz.. asked her to buy a bag for mi..hopefully her taste is good ba..hehe i wan wit MICKEY MOUSE de hehe..

Today my colleague Suhaila was on leave.. she was inchrage of mi de.. so Cheryl who is back from her leave came and helped mi.. she is more superior than suhaila.. anyway working wit her is great..she teached mi a lot of stuffs..and im not stress wit her.. tks to her im feeling better..working at tamp is good..at least i dun need to wake up so early..and i know where to eat cheap cheap food hehe..

Fab acc mi for lunch today..tink he is not feeling tat well.. rest early ba.. went cg after work.. and im so tiredd.. but had fun wit chelsia.. my life is so simple now.. yeah..its going to be a new week soon.. next week might be going for my grad ceremony..sad rite nobody go wit mi.. hope i can take leave ba.. and on fri im going back batam le.. mon going fisherman wit chelsia.. tue going celebrate cindy's bd.. wed going balaclavia wit cousin.. wooo ALL FULLY BOOKED.. srry no more time slot liao.. so ppl who wanted to book..pls try next next week..srry for any inconvenience caused...

Give mi some time.. to HEAL

With Love, 12:29 AM



Thursday, August 11, 2005'♥

Its just another normal day.. just tat i went home str after work.. its been veri long tat i went home after work.. maybe im trying to occupy myself ba. not to tink so much.. the newspaper tat i subsrcribe have been stacking up so high.. i didnt even had the time to read it..

While on my way to work today someone called mi.. didnt dare to turn back (for those of u who watched the maid u shld know y) hahah then i realise its FAB!!!! surprise to see him.. he told mi tat he have been transferred back to tamp liao.. which means i finally got ppl to acc mi for lunch le.. since i came tamp DBS ive been going for lunch alone.. so sad rite..in the pantry..coz all my collegaues either veri old if not its other races no topic to talk hai...

This sunday might be going out wit selyn they all to see fireworks.. woo tats my fave hobby.. might bring Kelvin along..coz his 21st bd lei.. he have been pestering mi so much to pei him haha.. so i hope they wont mind ba.. lolz..

going for cg tmr.. my week is packed.. finally next week going back to BATAM le.. been so eager abt it.. i wanted so much to have a break.. break free from this stressful country..break free of his memories...just now i was looking for some file tat i came across some photos of mi and him ..yes again.. haiz.. y like dat??tats the bad pts of coming home so early..haiz.. 2 more days and its a week.. this is the most down period of my life.. time passes so long.. the hurt is still there.. i realli dun understand..dont we have a second option?? y must things turn out like these.. last time u remind mi of not saying tat word..u say u will angry..and yet u are the one telling it to mi?? reminds mi of a song..

翻着我们的照片,想念若隐若现,
去年的冬天,我们笑得很甜,
看着你哭泣的脸,对着我说再见,
来不及听见,你已走得很远,
也许你已经放弃我,也许已经很难回头,
我知道自己错过,请再给我一个理由,说你不爱我,
就算是我不懂,能不能原谅我,
请不要把分手当作你的请求,
我知道坚持要走是你受伤的藉口,
请你回头,我会陪你一直走到最后,
就算没有结果,我也能够随,
我知道你的痛,是我给的承诺,
你说给过我笑容,沉默是因为包容,
如果要走,请你记得我,
如果难过,请你忘了我.

With Love, 7:23 PM



Wednesday, August 10, 2005'♥

im so tired after a long day.. seems tat nowadays after work always go out.. tat leaves mi wit no rest..its been long since ive stayed at home..so i declared tmr shall be a STAY AT HOME DAY...

some of the pics i took during these two days..



she is so cute rite..so bubu de..hehe



Got back from ah zhen house..yeah to see my beautiful god daughter wor.. so cute.. she got veri obvious double eyelid..and long lashes..so i tink she will grow up to be veri pretty de wor.. hehe.. but my gong gong fren..named her LIM XUE TING..CHARLOTTE.. diaoz.. y call xue ting?? so obiang hahah..stayed and chatted wit her.. wit ah zhu..and shao mei..wowo its like a secondary sch gathering lei..so fun, missed the times..anyway we decided to take a cab home..super far lor at Commonwealth..

kelvin called mi and asked my whereabouts..so surprised today he nv worked..he say his bd coming hope i can celebrate wti him..anyway for those of u who dunno who he is.. i knew him for 6 yrs le.. haha and hes been in love wit mi since..lolz.. jkin la...actually Kelvin offered to send mi home.. but too bad shao mei wit mi coz he's is a bike ma..haha spoiler la shao mei..hahahah...

yst had a great adventure wit my dear cousin..xiao han..supposingly to be three of us..but tupperware ah sao need to do her e-learning at home..so too bad.. haha we watched the movie THE MAID.. nice nice show..although 3/4 of the show my eyes are closed.. tooo bad no guys watched wit mi..haha no sense of sercurity wor.. then went to eat at the RICE TABLE.. wooo hoo so yummy...feels like eating back in BATAM.. anyway xiao han is veri gong gong de...got one chk she say is TERIYAKI chk..pls lor..tat is an INDONESIA RESt.. muahahhaha..lol..then we went to marina square and watched the fireworks.. all ard us is couples..nvm we shall not be affected de.. enojoy ourselves man..we are so excited everytime the fireworks changes..i tink their recorder all got out voices hahaha.. we walked ard the area coz there is simply too many ppl le.. finallly reached home ard 11 plus.. too damn shag le.. hehe..



my fave fireworks...




and of coz not to forget the nu zhu jiao of the day haha:



chat wit him online for awhile..but he seems busy.. or maybe cold towards mi ba.. haiz..

anyway i wanna watch DEUCE BIAGLOW.. xiao han on ah?? lol

With Love, 11:49 PM



Tuesday, August 09, 2005'♥

Happy National Day Singapore!!!!... yeah.. time now is 2.30am.. just reached home and i wanted to start blooging le.. ah zhen called mi and she is in the labour ward le.. her baby is coming out any sooner.. congrats to steph sister silvia.. gave birth to a baby boy wor.. i tink at 12 ba..wooohoo.. so happy for them wor.. ah zhen jia you, push push push..

My cousin and i had an karaoke session wit the taxi driver hahaha the radio is playing oldies...and so happen we knew all the songs..so we sang along..Lame rite.. Fisherman village is veri fun..the food there cheap as well as the beer.. we bought Heniken 6 for $30 buckz wor.. so cheap...while listening to the songs.. i cannot tahan anymore and called him.. but too bad he's sleepign and my background is so noisy so i cant hear exactly wad he say..anyway im still waiting for the reply of the friendster message...

I felt veri tired now.. orite orite gonna zzz liao..hope i can have a good dreams... countdown 10 more days to freedom...wooo hooo... i love them all...

With Love, 2:05 AM



Monday, August 08, 2005'♥

Realise tat i have been blogging daily now.. tink if i nv blogged out all my feelings i will go crazy soon de...

Bad news: I bought a cake.. for popo to eat from Bengawan Solo.. When i stepped into the house my mum asked mi whether is it we are no longer together.. wad a qn to ask..when u just got home.. i told her the truth and she asked mi not to hate him.. hate him?? no la..hating a person requires alot of energy and emotion.. and currently i have no time for tat.. she say she understand how he feels.. hopefully tats the real reason ba.. popo still did not know the truth yet.. she made some popiah asked mi to bring some for him.. if u wld have see my face just now.. i laugh until so FAKE tat i tink my foundation will crack...tink cindy and wawa u all have kou fu le ba...tmr bring the popiah for u guys ba.. no choice if not later she sure know i broke off wit him le.. dun wan popo to know so soon...coz she sure will feel disappointed de//

Started my first day in Dbs Tampines.. more security but the office is onli one fifth of chai chee lor.. My job is totally different from wad i have in chai chee.. my dept is incharge of all those passbook tat is stuck in the updating machine.. i need to key the data in and then send back to customers.. interesting lor..but then coz its monday so there is a lot of passbook from the weekends lor.. haha do until i mad..nearly did OT..so next time ur passbook kanna stuck in the machine..i will know de hahah.. There are not much colleagues of my age de.. disappointing lei.. and most of them are malays..so i went lunch alone.. saw shao mei so we decided to eat lunch everyday le..yeah..she wking at CPF builiding..i missed my khakis for lunch at Chai chee.. and bennie too... selyn started her job at DBS today too..hope she enjoys it ba.. haha we are the DBS GANG..

My mood for today slightly better le ba.. except tat i scare i cant control myself and msged him.. tried to do alot of stuffs to keep myself busy.. later going to mit some of my frens for a drink at Fisherman Village.. my fren are the most happiest ppl when i broke up wit my bf coz they finally got to mit mi le.. after a long period..always say i pang seh wan lor.. which is not the truth.. tmr is national day le..happy bd SIngapore!!!! going to mit my coussiiiieee for the LONELY POWERPUFF OUTING.. even though we are single we can oso be HAPPY de rite?? except for an extra one who now is in LOVE>> she better dun do so if not mi and cindy will kick her ass lor.. hahahaha...

GOOD NEWS: My god daughter is coming to this world tmr le..yeah..at National Day wor.. zhen called mi today and told mi tat her doctor told her tat she got high blood pressure.. *EAT and slp like a PIG SOMEMORE LA* so the baby need to come out if later than that the baby might have danger.. felt so happy for her.. although Raymond is not a perfect husband but at least he nv shrink his reponsibilities.. one pt for him ba.. haha..gonna visit baby charlotte on wed.. God i pray tat zhen can gib birth smoothly...that both of them will be safe... hehe..

Got a letter from ITE..Selyn u going for the COM CEREMONY?? if going got to go for a briefing at Sep..how how..and guess wad the GOH is The MINISTRY OF EDUCATIOn..hahah lets complain to him on tat day ba..muahah.. going anot tell mi hor.. coz need to reply de..

K la.. im gonna to go and enjoy my life.. the most impt pt in life is to be HAPPY?? no more crying le shirley....

With Love, 7:10 PM



'♥

Just came back after a long day.. was in Indoor Stadium the whole day from morning until now.. was super tired.. wanted to sleep but i cant..

The moment i switched on the light of my room.. i saw tat my com table is placed wit all the photo of mi and him together.. i kept it and my mum took out today when she was tidying the table again ba.. i tot tat i can str away go and slp after a tiring day.. but looks like now i have to keep all the photos again...one of these days im going to tell my mum tat he and I are through.. dunno how to tell her..coz she sure veri disappointed de.. haiz..wad to do tat the truth...

I tried all sorts of way to distract myself from thinking abt him today..I told myself if he wished to salvage this relationship..if he still got tat little feelings for mi he would have called mi or msged mi..i checked my phone now and then but it didnt ring at all.. until now it still de same.. im here crying my hearts now..does he ever know?? does he ever care?? suan le.. maybe this is oso good for mi ba.. so tat i wld not pin any hopes tat he might still care for mi...maybe i shld realli get on wit my life from now on...

Service was good..and i wept during the worship session.. Felt happier after tat.. Humans might not be always there for mi..but God is always there for mi.. Amen.. went to FOP after tat.. had a good time there..except tat i was super tired le.. coz there was a long queue befoer going in.. imagine queing 5 hrs in the sun?? haiz..

I saw him in msn... his nick still put juju..he might have forgotten to change it.. wanted so much to talk to him..... but i guess he would find mi irritating ba.... im looking so much like a panda..due to lack of sleep and oso of excessive crying.. my eyes are so puffy.. tat i realise i dun look great at all now.. haiz tmr going for the first day of work at DBS TAM.. hope tat i wont look tat bad ba..got to go and slp liao le...

Tks for the encouragement tat all my frens gave.. i wld not go back to smoking de la..dun worry.. anyway Fabian im not so strong as u tink i am.. tks for calling up mi.. hope u find a new job soon...

Been repeating the song Tian Kong by Jolin.. its so nice.. yet veri sad..

With Love, 12:06 AM



Sunday, August 07, 2005'♥

Initially wanted to stay at home and cry my hearts out..after awhile i realise tat this shld not be the solution to all the problems... i decided to go out and relax myself abit..

Met chelsia ard 7.30pm yst but i was late.. she went to the popular to shop shop.. then this guy approach mi..and talked to mi..at first tot he was a salesman then after tat he told mi his from my sec sch..was kinda of shock i didnt recognise him at all..anyway his name is Jason and he asked mi abt one of my sec sch frens Jas...Mind u my eyes were so puffy tat i didnt even dare to look at him...

Chelsia came to my rescue and we went to Suntec.. coz im miting lian to take my clothes tat i bought online... Reached there the first thing i saw is the wedding fair.. memories flooded back.tat time we both walked past and the uncle die die pull us in..and the auntie talked to us alot abt the wedding package.. those were the days..hated to go suntec and esplanade now..coz we always go there de..saw the place tat we last parted, the place tat we hugged the last... nvm i ren...

Ate dinner at Marche.. tks chelsia who is alwyas there couselling mi.. then we went to Balaclavia to have a few drinks.. Drank Red Wine Merlot.. the ambience is nice and the live band is good.. It was when the song "I dun want to miss a thing" tat i totally broke down.. chelsia went to the toilet during tat period.. i kept taking deep breathe to stop my tears from flowing down..but too late.. i started crying... I tot back on tat day the first time i went to his house to cook spagethi for him..then we watched Armagedon together.. i cant help but tink.. Y must u be so cruel to mi?? y things will turn out like these?? but no matter how hard i tot of a reason to convince myself.. i cant seems to find an answer...Frens have been telling mi to control myself and not think too much.. but i cant let mi vent out everything just for this few days.. bear wit mi ba..

I cant seem to get use to single life yet.. maybe everything shouldnt started four months ago.. then i wont be so tong ku ba.. i drank and drank and this is the first time in my whole life i actually vomitted outside.. i dun wished to go home..becos i know tat once i go back i will continue to tink de.. so i took one sleeping pills from chelsia and had a good sleep.. maybe to u guys im acting too childishly...this is wad we always tot but when it happens to us.. we then realise the hurt tat it have done to my life...

What i need now is time.. time to get over him day by day.. time to start over again.. time to erase every memories together..

With Love, 7:35 AM



Saturday, August 06, 2005'♥

After 21 years of living in this world now then i realise im a HINDERANCE...

Reason: He cant fulfill wad he want in life and havin a relationship now is like a hiderance to him...things just happen so fast tat i didnt have a time to catch my breath..


4 months... I got a "FAIL" in our relationship... At this point of time where im the most helpless.... I looked through the SMS u sent mi over and over again.. my heart aches everytime i saw the word SORRY.. Dun say sorry when u dun meant it ok? wad u have done to mi is not a single word SORRY will do.. First time in my life i committed so much, first time in my life i loved a guy so much..first time i sacrifice so much for a guy.. first time in my life i feel like dying after a break up.. when i was typing this blog.. one of the photos tat we took accidentally fell off the table.. and i tink it realli meant the END.. Looking back at the smile on our face.. I missed it alot.. maybe to u these 4 mths meant nothing at all.. u might onli be sad for one or two days and get on wit ur life.. to mi its different it meant one or two months..or maybe years to move on.. after all i conclude tat im a failure in relationship ba.. I felt dirty, i felt cheap, i felt guilty..


Tell mi this is the rite thing to do rite now.. tell mi tat im just a fool..tell mi tat im poor in my judgement.. For those who always dont approve of this relationship..comeon u had ur chance now, laugh at mi ba..

All these while ive been fighting the battle alone.. onli a few frens knows wad im going tru.. and i wanna thank those frens who stand by mi.. calling mi at once when things happen.. they are Selyn, Jessie, Cindy, Xiao han, Huilian and even Dexun.. ya maybe ur rite i shld have listened to u..

Good for u u have now no more COMMITMENTS LE.. study hard and work hard ba.. i will try my best and forget abt u de.. i surely will... the hole in my heart is BIG but im sure i will be able to wound it up someday...

Going out now... i hope to find my happiness there... everyone pls dun call mi coz im not in the mood to talk and repeat the same old things.. i need time alone...

With Love, 3:09 PM



Friday, August 05, 2005'♥

Job.. is a character in the Bible....he is known as a great believer of God..there was a time when he lost all things..his possession, his family, his frens and everything tat he have... Ppl asked him to curse God and dun believe in Him...But he did not.. instead he continue to praise God..

A verse tat he wrote: "Naked I came from my mother's womb, naked I shall return....

This verse struck mi just now.. even though how bad my situation is rite now.. I shally Praise Him continually.. and not dwell in hatred and cursed.. I shall not let the Devil win over my heart..





The house opposite my house caught fire just now.. i was typing my the other blog entry just now and didnt realise a single thing..my mum came to mi and told mi to close my window.. i always tot tat smell is from the burning of insence paper due to the seventh month.. Went to the kitchen and took a look.. The fire is veri big.. the glass on the window droppedd off..luckily no one was injured although im not veri sure.... saw the flames through the window.. burning and burning.. if there is someone else in the house how bad could it be.. the person must be struggling... I felt ashamed of wad i typed just now in the previous entry.. everything has a solution to it.. y shld i tot tat the life is so meaningless..when everyone is trying their veri best to put off the fire just to save a life??

How worse can it be..There were four police car, one ambulance, two fire engines.. saw from the fire man's face tat they are veri tired and i realli appreciate them do their part to save a person's life..the whole process took one and a half hours.. a lot of ppl gathered around to see from below..thank God tat no one is hurt..

Im just wanna say srry to my grandma, mama and daddy..srry for shouting at u all.. my mama saw tat i haven ate my dinner..went to fried rice for mi..i cried when i saw the effort she made instead of being angry wit mi.. a thousand apologies..

With Love, 9:43 PM



'♥

i cant take it anymore....

i shouted at my mum and my grandma just now.. wad is going over me?? the Devil realli did a great job to mi these few days.. my temper have not been good these few days.. tats y i stayed away from home.. tried many ways.. by shopping..walking alone in the streets til veri late.. slp my way thru the day.. but it doesnt work..

Nothing makes mi happy anymore.. im a failure.. srry to everyone who pin high hopes on mi..ive disappoint u all..

Lastly..i hate this world....

With Love, 8:06 PM



Thursday, August 04, 2005'♥

I tried my best to type out an entry but i cant.. feeling a sense of loss..dunno how to express myself... been a failure in many things.. friendship.. relationship and even kinship...

I lost it all... and i can boldly say tat IM NOT HAPPY AT ALL!!!!!!

With Love, 11:23 PM



'♥

Just reached home and its oredi 1217am le.. haiz.. few more hours and im off to work..sianz.. Met Mi Jie for dinner today but she off work at 8 so i went shopping myself today.. Its veri dangerous for mi to shop wit no one ard..coz i tend to buy alot of things.. i need ppl like Selyn and Jessie ard..coz they will nagged at mi haha..

The mystery amt of money in my bank is still not solved yet but im promise myself not to use it..coz who know the next few days they will tansfer it out of my account le.. My hands were freaking tired today..due to the shopping bags.. not in a good mood these few days.. so this the kind of thereapy tat i choose.. and it comes wit a price.. I bought a Handbag from Mango, one formal pants.. one skirt, a pair of heels.. and a tshirt.. for those of u who knew mi u shld know tat all these are NEEDs.. wad i owned is oredi veri old, if not i cant wear le.. so dun say tat im a spendthrift pls..hehe.. and most importantly i bought FAMOUSE AMOS, missed it so much..

Went to Guess and saw the watch tat i have been eyeing for a year..its the first time i loved a watch so much...its the diamond watch with Guess on it.. alot of place was out of stock le..coz too long liao..but i loved it alot..esp the white one...went to try it..but the GUESS watch is much exp than the one sold in normal shop.. it cost $205..while others is from $140-195...the devil keep asking mi to buy it buy it.. and im realli feel so tempted man.. but in the end i tot of the holiday trip tat i wanted to go wit dodo so i gave it up.. so heart pain.. nvm la..if its meant to be urs it will be urs.. (who want to transfer more money to mi?? i dun mind an early bd present hehe)...

Met Mi Jie at Indochine...loved the ambience alot.. and of coz memories flood back to my mind.. just as i was abt to cross the road.. i saw Alvin again.. saw him yst and today.. why?? we nv contact each other veri long le..and i saw tat he is wit his new gf.. hope they will be happy ba.. he was shocked to see mi.. but i act as if i dun care at all.. ordered one jug of beer but it was not enough so we ordered another glass.. looking forward to Mi jie bd.. i will be going back to Batam.. to celebrate at Ktv wit her.. then we shall drink as much as we can le.. yeah.. so carefree..

Tmr will be miting Huilian at City Hall she is going to pass mi the stuff tat i asked her to order le..yippeee.. after tat tink i might be going tampines to look for selyn ba..anyway she is coming to my company for interview..hope she will get the job ba..yeah..

Im tired of guessing.. once and for all the truth pls..

With Love, 12:16 AM



Wednesday, August 03, 2005'♥

Its Alicia last day today.. we were so slack the whole day.. i simply just sit around and chit chat man.. a day just passed like dat lor..went for lunch with Bennie instead of Darina they all..coz they are so busy wit the accounts stuff.. anyway its been long since i talked to her.. she is my sec sch frens wor..glad to see her working wit mi at the same company today..

Went to check my account to see whether my pay Agnes helped mi bankk in le ma.. to my surprise the amt is doubled...and now my bank is four digit man.. haha first time in my whole twenty one yrs of life got so much money..but i tink its due to some errors ba.. maybe ppl transfer wrongly i tink ..haha..

Met Jess for dinner today.. went Orchard and our dear ger was late man.. Went to G2000 and looked for formal blouse..and i bought one.. realli liked it alot man.. anyway today is the last day of their sales too..im so heng..hehe then we proceeed to Far East..ate at Ramen Tien.. was so full man.. then went to MILADY.. My fren shop and bought a pants at forty bucks..tink its ok la.. liked it alot.. and its the last piece man.. wanted to buy a heels..but not much time coz all the shops are closing.. haiz..thats working life man..just shopped awhile and ppl are closing liao.. Took the Express Bus home..but it was not Express at all man.. so we chatted in the bus.. time realli passes veri fast and our dear Jess had been working for 3 mths plus le..hehe first time lei.. she can worked for so long lor..

Im too tired le.. eyes shutting down..gonna go wait for dodo to call.. will be miting Mi Jie for dinner at Indochine tmr..my fav place lei.. hopefully she treat mi hehe... hope i will be able to buy a pair of heels soon wor.. ZZZZZZZZ

With Love, 12:23 AM



Monday, August 01, 2005'♥

Monday blues faded away quite early today.. mainly coz i was too free in the office today.. Citra was back from her leave..There was Alicia, mi and a new girl.. so the usual work of two was divided into four.. we finished our work veri early..and there was realli nothing for us to do.. so mi and Alicia went to help Darina's dept of checking and stamping of the application of the new accounts... so it is the whole day just passed like these..

Geok Poh who is my supervisor requested to see mi today.. keep asking mi to tink over whether to stay here anot.. my answer was no haha.. coz when alicia is gone..onli left mi and citra..it will be so busy again.. anyway she passed mi the security tag today.. so i can go in and out of the office now without waiting for ppl to open the door for mi le..yeah..

Its pay day finally, msged Sandy and she told mi my cheque was wit her.. but i was so shocked tat she called mi from Great World City.. heard from them that there had been a great reshuffle in the staffs.. Agnes was transferred to FOX Seiyu.. Sandy to Great world, ting ting to Raffles City, Nur to our kids side..too bad im not tat..and bestina to be the first in-charge..dioaz.. wad a great change man.. anyway just now Agnes called mi and told mi tat she went down to Great World City to take some stuffs..and she collected my cheque for mi and she will help mi bank in tmr.. wow..so good of her man.. will find one day go and look for her de.. so i tink i will onli get my pay on wed..haiz..

Got home after work nv went anywhere.. too tired le ba..reached home and saw a letter on the table.. from ITE..tot its abt the Grad Ceremony.. but i didnt even expect tat its a letter from ITE stating tat i got the Certificate of Merit.. heard from Selyn she got it a few days ago.. i always tot i wont get it.. so i didn;t bother to go and open up letterbox just now.. hehe tats the onli thing which makes mi happy today..

i crossed my fingers and prayed tat its not true.. tat the thought will disappear from my mind...

With Love, 8:06 PM







Lover ♥

name Kerin
age Forever 21


Gossips





Darling Reads

X-tin
Shufen
Xiaohan
Vivian
Jessica


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Confession of a Human Being
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